The WWE seem to be going in a new direction, they have a new frame of mind. An in with the new and out with the old sort of mentality. This years Extreme Rules was the first ppv of a new era where it gave the men and women of the future a chance to shine. And shine they certainly did.
Extreme Rules is a ppv where you’d normally see incredibly violent bouts, street fights, ladders, tables, fire, dug shite the lot but this year things were abit different, WWE seem to be concentrating more on well built animosity and storylines than the hardcore elements. Which I think sort of defeats the purpose of the ppv but with that being said there were still parts of the PPV I thoroughly enjoyed.
El Torito beat Hornswoggle on the pre show and that’s all I have to say about that. NEXT.
I was both pleased and heartbroken to see Cesaros match would be opening the show. Don’t you know that mans a king. KISS HIS RING! We saw The king of swing take on ex tag partner Jack Swagger and the pro toker that is RVD. I like to think RVD and Swagger had a wee bong or two before the match because that is both romantic and cute. I’ve referred to RVD as yawn Van Dam recently which I feel really bad about because in this match all men delievered and Van Dam in particular was on top form.
Triple Threat ELIMINATION match. Cesaro v Swagger v RVD.
Heyman cuts a promo and when Heyman cuts a promo you listen. He says WWE only do it right one night a year. He longs for that heat so naturally he mentions Lesnar ending the streak. Lesnar ended the streak btw. Heyman then praises the King Cesaro and introduces him as they head to the ring. Soon as the bell rings all the boises are going at it. RVD manages to fight Cesaro and Swagger off but they double team him instead, for auld times sake. Doesn’t last long though because Cesaro gets straight to kicking and uppercutting Swagger. No boises anymore 😦 Cesaro gets some more uppercuts on the go but Swagger manages to execute a big powerslam on the King. RVDs back in the picture and he goes daft with some forearms on Swagger and follows this with a thrust kick. Next RVD catapults Cesaro out of the corner and on top of Swagger. RVD gets a two count. More back and fourth from all the boises. Cesaro catches an RVD crossbody but Swagger boots both them to the floor, he gets himself a wee two count. Swagger brings RVD back in from the floor and hits him with a few knees in the corner but RVD manages to back drop Swagger to the floor. Cesaro wants in on the backdrops and attempts this with RVD but he manages to hang on and turns it into a powerbomb. Lovely. As RVD makes it to his feet he’s instantly taken out again as Swagger connects with a clothesline. He brings RVD into the ring and gets himself another two count. He slams RVD on the back of his head and again another two count.
Swagger connects with another slam and then nails a Swagger Bomb but again RVD kicks out at two. Nae yis Swagger. Nae yis. The Kings back in the ring and he drops Swagger and it is time. Time to be swung. Swung by the King of Swing. But RVD breaks it up. BOOOO. Covers Cesero and gets a two count. RVD goes to the top rope but Swaggers having nane of that and runs up and slams him on his coopin. He locks in the Patriot Lock but RVD manages to roll through and deliver a wee kick to Swagger. Cesaro nails a springboard uppercut on Swagger and then stands on the second rope and superplexes him from the apron, beautiful. But RVD being a wee cheeky nails a fivestar frogsplash an covers Swagger getting the pin. The commentators don’t know their erse from their gubs. There’s some confusion and they act as though it was just a two count because for some reason they didn’t seem to realise it wan an ELIMINATION match. Swaggers eliminated anyways, gid to see yi big man, do come again. Cesaro goes straight to work on RVD with 3 gutwrench slams, this gets him a two count.
Fans are chanting for Cesaro, such an awkward chant, so wrong yet so very right. Heymans been a top manager and cheers the king on. RVD attempts a kick but Cesaro blocks it and instead nails him with a beautiful german for a 2 count. RVD rolls out to the floor, Cesaro leaps of the ring and decks him in the coopin and then tosses him viciously into the fan barrier. He clims up on to the barrier but RVD grabs his leg and he falls. He goes to the apron and does a large leap nailing a braw kick to Cesaros neck. RVDs back in the ring posing and stuff as Cesaro makes his way back in, RVD hits the rolling thunder and manages a two count. He then lands a split legged moonsault getting another two count. He brings a trash can in from under the ring but Cesaro smartly baseball slides it into him. He brings RVD back in the ring and grabs the trash can, he attempts to hit RVD with it but he manages to block it and took him down with a scissors getting you guessed it another two count. RVD does that wee spot, throws the can and kicks it right into Cesaros dome. HOW DARE YOU BETRAY YOUR KING. He places the can ontop of Cesaro and goes to the top for the Frogsplash but Cesaro dodges it and hits the Neutralizer on top of the can. 1,2,3. Beautiful.
The match was sloppy at parts but it was enjoyable and a great effort from all 3 men. The trash can bumps looked especially painful.
Next we go backstage. A trainers checking yer man Dbry out. Steph appears, looking FIERCE. She says she’s concerned about Drys safety, because she can’t control Kane and she knows Dbrys in bad shape. She says he doesn’t have to compete tonight and instead could officially surrender the World Heavyweight Title. She’s a wee cheeky. The fact her acting is so horredous just makes her that bit more glorious, it really adds to her heelyness and I LOVE it. Dbry tells Steph to get out his face, he says he is the champ and he’ll somehow be leaving the same way. Steph doesn’t agree and says he’ll be walking out Kane’s bitch. THAT’S NOT PG. I love Steph. I want her.
Bo Dallas Vignette. They are pretty cool but he’s just not my cuppa tea, though I don’t doubt for a second that the future will be extra bright for him.
Alexander Rusev(with Lana) V R-Truth and Xavier Woods.
Lana opened the proceedings by being a GODDESS. She dedicates the match to the most powerful man in the world, a man who makes fools out of Americans. A man she respects more than any other. Her role model and idol. Who just so happens to be the rather controversial Russian president Vladimir Putin. His face shows on the big screen and the fans go daft with USA chants. CHEAP HEAT. Lanas cheap heat is my favourite of the cheap heats. Though I feel its incredibly risky, they are obviously just capitilizing on the whole East V West hostilities in Ukraine, which of course will generate mighty heat but as I said it’s risky, very risky. The match is exactly how you’d expect it to go. A squash fest.
Rusev gets straight to it by kicking Woods off the apron and goes for Truth before the match even begins. Rusev raises the apron and throws Woods into the steel frame of the ring. He then throws Truth back into the ring. He connects with an overhead suplex to Woods on the floor. He makes his way back into the ring and the ref holds him back. Loose cannon this wan. A we want Lana chant starts. Cute. We all want her. The match officially starts and Rusev takes control, he hits a huge splash in the corner but he then runs into a boot then Truth manages to catch Rusev with another kick to the coopin. He hits a big right hand in the corner and a wee dropkick from the ropes. Rusev goes for a clothesline but missed and Truth takes him down with an elbow instead, he hits the scissors kick and gets himself a two count. Lana tells Rusev to crush Truth, he hits a big side slam and the The Accolade for the win.
Say what you will about Rusev, but when he does get some action in he is a great athlete, don’t you think? Also LANA.
Wee Renee Young is backstage with Evolution. Trips says they all have ego’s and it’s well deserved. I agree that two out of the three of you deserve an ego, don’t be silly now Trips. He brags some more, he says they have 31 titles between them. Orton with his lack of his eyes says The shield will perish tonight and you can believe in that. Then the three of them do the Shield pose and Renees pants are absolutely wringing wet.
Wade v Big E for his shiney Intercontinental belt.
Wades out first and the crowd LOVE him. I nodded as he made his way to the ring, he deserves this I said audibly. He cut a promo he says the MERS virus has landed in the US but even that will pale in comparison to what he’s going to do to Big E tonight.
Big E strikes first, he takes Barrett down with a fierce shoulder tackle. Barrett goes to the outside to regain his composure but Big E follows. Barrett manages to kick him but Big E regains control as the fans 100% back Wade, he works him over on the floor and then spears him into the ring post. He brings Wade back in the ring but Barret manages to deliver a superkick which sends Big E to the floor, he leaps of the apron with an elbow drop and then rolls E back into the ring and gets himself a two count. He delivers some right hands and goes for a suplex which E blocks and instead hits one of his own. There’s some back and fourth from the two but Barrett manages to hit a suplex, followed by a crossbody.
Gets another two count. He hits E with a big boot to the coopin and stomps away at him. He boots E down to the apron and then drags him to the top of the turnbuckle and hits his back repeatedly. Barrett charges for E but is instead met with a huge belly to belly suplex, once back on his feet E runs over Barrett and delivers another belly to belly. He then spears Barrett and knocks him out the ring. E attempts to suplex Barrett in from the apron but he manages to fight out of it, E regains control by running the ropes and spearing Barrett of the apron and they both meet the floor with a tremendous thud. E brings Barrett back into the ring and gets himself a two counts. He goes for a shoulder thrust in the corner next but misses and Barrett nails Wasteland instead and gets a near fall. Barrett lets us know the Bad News Bullhammer is a-coming but E catches him and slams him for a two count. Next E runs the ropes again and catches Barrett with a mighty splash. Straps are doon. It is time. E goes for the big ending but Barrett manages to slide out and shoves him into the corner instead. Barrett goes for the Bullhammer, E ducks but Barrett manages to hit it and got himself a shiney new belt. Winner and New WWE Intercontinental Champion Bad News Barrett.
Adam Rose Vignette. Is it awright if I’m neither a lemon or a rosebud?
The Shield vs. Evolution
Ahh this match, it was so refreshing. A joy to watch actually, a splendid contest with all 6 men contributing towards the action, cept Batista, BOOOOO.
Evolution are out first, The shield take 10,000 years but finally their music plays and out the shieldsies come. Both the teams face off in the ring as the ref tells them to ring the bell. They all begin brawling. SO INTY THIS. Shieldsies manage to clear the ring and the world all hold hands and sing nice songs. The bell finally goes, didny ring the first time, that’s it now though. We have ourselves a match! Trips and Rollins start things off, Rollins takes Trips down with a big knee and then splashes him in the corner follows this with a clothesline over the top rope and then does a glorious dive onto him. Amazing. Seth is god or at least his equivalent. They are both back in the ring and Trips manages to connect with a thunderous clothesline. Trips CAN wrestle btw. Honestly. Batistas tagged in next and met with a round of boo’s. HAHAHA. Batista goes to work on Rollins and hits him with some knees in the corner. Ortons tagged in next though I fail to understand how he can see. The fans start chanting you can’t wrestle at Batista I assume because he’s the only one out of the six men who can’t. Trips gets a cheap shot while the refs looking elsewhere. Orton gets to stomping away at Rollins, he catapults him under the botton rope and then tags the almighty Beak in. Trips hits Rollins with a knee to the jaw. Batistas back in and get’s boo’ed yet again. GO HOME. He connects with a huge kick to Rollins head and gets himself a two count. Ortons tagged in and him and Batista do some double team on Rollins. Orton drops him over the top rope then slams for a two count. He then gets Rollins in a headlock but he manages to break it up with a big side slam but Trips and Batista run in to stop Rollins making a tag.
Somehow Rollins manages to recover and finally counters and manages to hit Orton with an enziguri. I call it an enzigroovy. Ambrose is in and he hits a lovely dropkick on Orton, he never saw it coming 😉 He takes Orton into the corner and stomps the absolute shit out of him and then proceeds to knock Batista off the apron. TITTY MASTA 4 CHAMP. He takes Trips down and wait for it he applies the figure four to Orton. My favourite submission move. My favourite move in general. Now you know. It was beautiful. THAT’S HOW YOU PAY HOMAGE, MIZ. Someone tell Miz. Reigns is in and he clears the ring, he’s a TANK! I have major arm envy for his arms. He tosses Batista into the barrier and then attempts to spear Trips on the floor but he manages to dodge it and Reigns meets the steps instead. Ambrose and Orton are back in the corner now, Trips and Orton join him for a 3 on 1 beat down on the master of chebs. Batista kicks Deano out the ring. BOO-TISTA chant. Haha. He clotheslines Ambrose and gets himself a 2 count. Orton goes straight to stomping Ambrose and then gets him in a headlock. Deano attempts to fight back but Orton dropkicks him and gets a two count. Trips is tagged in and he drops Ambrose and then dishes out some lefts and rights in the corner. He runs into a big boot but manages to hit a spinebuster on Deano, another two count.
Batistas back in and met with more boos. He hits an elbow off the ropes and then goes for the pin. Batista applies a submission as the crowd erupt with a you can’t wrestle chant. Deano breaks the hold but is knocked down with a boot to the coopin. Trips is tagged back in and is met with a backdrop from Ambrose and then a DDT. Batista and Reigns get involved, but Reigns knocks both Batista and Orton down. He gets Batista with a right hand off the ropes and then Ortons clotheslined over the top rope. Reigns sets his sights back on Batista and hits him with the big apron dropkick. He then proceeds to take out Trips and Orton who are on the floor. He makes his way back into the ring but Batista goes for the Batista Bomb. Rollins is a hero and managed to leap in and break it up. This gives Reigns the advantage and he hits Batista with a Superman punch. The Shieldsies go for the triple powerbomb and successfully slam Batista to the ground, but Orton and Trips make the save. Deano and Orton brawl on the floor, as Rollins attempts to leap out, he misses and hits the barrier instead.
Back in the ring Trips nails a pedigree on Reigns but Ambrose runs in and brawls to the floor with Trips. Batistas the legal man but and he pins Reigns. I thought he had it. But naaaaah Reigns kicks out at 2 because he is superman. Orton drags himself into the ring and manages to hit Reigns with an RKO. HOLY SHIT. I thought that was it. Batista covers him because he can’t wrestle and has to rely on the men in his team who can wrestle. Rollins manages to save the day again and breaks the count at 2. PHEW! Orton grabs Rollins to the outside and they batter fuck out one another. At this point the brawl is all over the shop, Orton and Trips are battering Rollins in the timekeepers area, and Deano runs across the tables and gloriously leaps onto them. Rollins and Deano brawl with Batista and Trips into the crowd and they begin fighting high up the steps. Ambrose tumbles down a few stairs as Trips and Orton stalk their pray, but suddenly. Is it a bird? A plane? IT’S A SETH ROLLINS. He beautifully leaps from a high up balcony and takes out Orton, Trips and even Deano. It was sensational. I possibly peed a wee bit. Waw. Back in the ring Batista and Reigns finally manage to get back on their feet but Reigns is met with a spinebuster. More boos. This is fun.
Batista attempts the Batista Bomb again but Reigns manages to dodge it and instead hit a superman punch. Signals it is time. And yes, yes it was time. Nails Batista with a spear. 1, 2, 3. He writes a wee note that reads ‘that is how you execute a spear love Reigns xoxo’ throws it on his lifeless body and that’s that.
Seth was the star of the match, star of the night, star of the world. He was the stand out wrestler in the match not to mention the beautiful leap from the balcony. But to me this match told me that Reigns is marked as the star of the group. Believe in the Shieldsies.
Next up we see the Bray/Cena promo which was put together beautifully
John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt
I saw people claim this was MOTN. HOW!??? It was good. But it wasn’t great. For me there was far to much interference from the Wyatts, it made Bray look ridiculously weak and Cena mighty powerful. I hated it. I didn’t particularly enjoy the over the top gimmicky ending either but I guess i’m just fussy. But you have to admit the match was just so….obvious.
Cenas out first and met with boos. The Wyatts are out next and the crowd cheer. They want you to boo them ya know?
Bray slowly heads to the cage from his rocking chair, he gives the cage a wee shake before finally getting in. And here we go. Bray charges for Cena but his attempts are dodged and Cena applies a headlock but Bray manages to fight back and drop Cena. He clotheslines Cena from behind and the fans get behind Bray 100%. A wee back and fourth between the two then Cena manages to suplex Bray. BOOOOO. Cena contemplates climbing up the cage, as he attempts it he looks down and Harper and Rowan are giving him shadies from the outside so he decides to drop down but is met with a hard right hand from the mighty Bray. Cena manages to block a shot into the steel and begins to fight back but Bray is having none of that and successfully tosses him into the steel this time. He keeps control and manages to get a wee two count to. At this point the door of the cage is opened and Bray attempts to leave but Cena manages to stop him and catapults him head first into the cage. He goes to climb the cage again as Harper and Rowan taunt him. Bray manages to grab Cena by the head as he attempts to climb over the top and pulls him back over. They both begin a back and fourth of punches on the top rope. Cena manages to knock Bray down to the mat. Bray knocks the ropes while Cenas still on the top, he falls back and turns upside down in the corner and is met with a big splash from Bray, this gets him a two count. Bray does that smile of his, that glorious smile.
Bray goes for a toss but Cena blocks it. Bray manages to connect with a chokeslam and get himself another 2 count. Cena attempts the AA but Bray manages to block it, Cena regains control by nailing a dropkick. He goes to climb the cage, again. But Bray spiderwalks to the opened cage door. Glorious in every way. But Cena drops down and manages to stop him from escaping. Bray manages to knock Cena down with a forearm and gets himself another 2 count. He tosses Cena into the side of the cage. Cena regains his composure and tosses Bray into the cage. He connects with some shoulders from the ropes and then a slam and the five knuckle shuffle. Cena goes for the AA but Bray counters it and instead climbs up the cage. Cena grabs him and hits a sitdown powerbomb and gets a 2 count. Cenas like that ‘open the door’ but Rowans a meanie and shuts it and taunts him a wee bit. But Cena thinks he is invinsible and attempts to open the door while Rowans still holding it shut. He gets one foot out but not for long as Harper comes over to help his mate out, this leads to Bray attacking Cena from behind and dropping him coopin first, this gets a 2 count. Bray attempts a splash but misses.
Cena manages to climb up and over the cage but Rowan quickly climbs up and gets Cena up on his shoulders and forces him back up into the cage. Once back in the ring both Cena and Bray get some left and rights on the go. Cena manages to slam Bray and get himself a 2 count. He climbs the cage again but this time Harper climbs up on the opposite side and he meets Cena at the top and you guessed it knocks him right back over only he comes over to. The doors then opened as Bray heads towards it but Cena attempts to climb over at the same time and then manages to slam the cage door right onto Brays coopin. Cena decides against dropping down as Rowan is awaiting with a steel cage in hand. As he gets back in the cage Bray tosses him on his head and hits a splash for a 2 count. He goes for sister abigail but Cena manages to block it and instead the STF is locked in. The doors opened yet again and Bray tries to crawl to the door while Cena still has the STF locked in, but the hold is broken and Bray tries to desperately crawl out, Cena doesn’t allow it and grabs hold of his legs as Rowan grabs Brays arm and tries to pull him out. Cena manages to pull Bray back in and then proceeds to send Harper into the side of the cage. Bray then does the very same to Cena. He then attempts to climb the cage but Cena follows him. Once at the top rope they begin to trade shots and then Cena hits the AA from the second rope which was somewhat impressive, I guess.
He goes to pin Bray but Harper breaks the pin and is met by a clothesline from Cena. Cena’s arm is ever so hurt, but he attempts to climb the cage again. Rowan climbs up the opposite side and punches Cena at the top of the cage and then beats him down into the cage. Cena grabs Rowan by his glorious beard and slams him coopin first into the steel on top of the cage. Leave that mans beard alone, that’s art ya know! Cenas in charge and in my opinion making the Wyatts look incredibly weak, he hits Harper with a top rope leg drop. Cena is the only one on his feet. The door is opened yet again and Cena drags himself towards it but as he does the lights go out and the Wyatts graphic flashes. A distorted voice sings ‘he’s got the whole world in his hands’ and as the lights go on we see it’s some wee boay from up the road. This seems to scare the absolute shite out of Cena as he freezes in fear. Just um step out the cage, John. This allows Bray to nail Cena with a beaut of a sister abigail and he gets the win. Bray gives the wee guy a cuddle and the Wyatts music play as Harper and Rowan each take a hand of the wee guy as they make their way up the entrance. Bray laughs. The crowd boo Cena. The end.
The match was ok, but come on, the whole Cena freezing in fear instead of just simply stepping out the cage was a tad silly. Bray has definitely got into Brays head because he can turn wanes to the darkside. Cool.
Tamina Snuka vs. Paige
They start by locking up. Paige manages to take Tamina to the corner and begins to stomp away. Paige connects with a takedown and this gets her a 2 count. She trips Tamina into the ropes and begins battering her with some knees but Tamina connects with a big shot and knocks Paige to the ground. She gets a 2 count. She has some words with the ref and then whips Paige hard into the corner. Connects with a big scoop slam gets a 2 count. She follows this with another 2 more slams and gets another 2 count. Paige manages to come to and they both stumble to the outside.
Paige hits Tamina with a kick then attempts a head scissors off the apron but Tamina catches her instead and throws her head into the barrier. Tamina takes Paige to the top rope but Paige manages to nail a powerbomb. A botched count by the ref, she gets a 2 count. She slams Tamina on her coopin and gets another 2 count but Tamina nails a big slam and gets herself a 2 count of her own. Tamina attempts the superkick but Paige catches it and manages to turn it into the scorpion crosslock and keeps her title.
Ugh that match was awful. Paige tried to hard and Tamina has no idea how to ya know, be a star. Sorry girls.
Backstage with the Wyatts and that wane. He’s called little Johnny and he did a great job. Bray says they are free and their message is out now. He says Cena will soon have to join them. DAE IT. Wee Johnny says Cena WILL follow the buzzards and puts a sheep mask on. Cute. Kinda.
Promo for tonight’s main event.
Extreme Rules Match for the WWE World Heavyweight Title Kane v Daniel Bryan
Dbry goes straight to work on Kane as he attacks him as he’s on the way in. Kane basically just destroys Dbry around ringside. He throws Dbry back in the ring along with some chairs. But as Kane turns around he is met with a kendo stick shot to the dome. Dbry makes his way to the top rope Kane dodges him and follows this with a huge chair shot and proceeds to slam Dbry through some chairs and gets himself a 2 count. Back in the ring and its a back and forth affair. Dbry hits a lovely missile dropkick that sends Kane to the outside. Dbry of course dives through the ropes. Dbry begins taking the top off the announcers table, he hits kane with it. He takes a monitor and hits him with that to. He gets a piece of table and hits Kane again and again. Kane manages to fight back and he slams dbry onto the spanish table. Kane begins hitting dbry with a bit of table now and joins Dbry up on the spanish table. He goes for a chokeslam but Dbry manages to block it and instead sends Kane to the floor and then connects with a running knee.
Next Dbry does a nice wee spot where he runs off the table and hits Kane with a tornado DDT on the floor. He then delivered some kicks but Kane manages to throw him into the steps. He goes for a tombstone on the steps but Dbry manages to stop it and hits him with some kendo stick shots. Kane throws a plugged in tv into some water because he is a demon and demons do bad shit. He continues to batter lumps out Dbry and they fight to the production area, the place where there’s trucks and stuff. Dbry begins to fight back and hits Kane with a shovel. He puts him ontop of a car. Kane fights back and manages to back drop Dbry onto the top of the car. He throws a cylinder but misses and smashes the windshield instead. He swings for Dbry but he moves and his fist goes through the window of a car. Dbry gets a crowbar and nails Kane with it. He’s deed. Crowbars kill demons. So Dbry uses some Lesnar logic and uses a forklift to take Kane back to the ring. He drives it to the ring and then raises it above the rope, tilts it and Kane rolls off. Yes chants. He leaps of the Forklift with a diving headbutt. Only gets a 2 count.
As Dbry gets another chant going Kane sits up. He attempts a chokeslam but kindof botches it. He goes again and this time nails it. It only gets a 2 count. Kane gets a chair and cuts his throat with it and bleeds over the world. He goes for a tombstone on a chair but Dbry counters it and nails a DDT and gets himself a wee 2 count. He begins to hit Kane with chairshots to the back and then locks in the Yes Lock. Kane breaks free and hits Dbry with a kendo stick. Dbry manages to use the kendo stick as leverage for the Yes Lock. Kane manages to get out of the ring thus breaking the hold. Which can only mean a suicide a dive. Kane manages to catch him mid air and beautifully chokeslams him THROUGH THE ANNOUNCERS TABLE! He sets up a normal table and pulls out some gasoline from under the ring and soaks it up and then set it alight, he goes to the apron but Dbry manages to knock him through the burning table. Crew members spray Kane with fire extinguishers ASAP. He goes stumbling into the ring, flying knee to the coopin. Dbry gets the 1,2,3 meaning he keeps his belt.
The match was compelling at some points but I feel the crowd were rather flat. Kane recovers quick afterwards and Dbry gets away, he stands on stage as Kane does the explode thing. To me Dbrys win didn’t matter much because Kane still looked strong.
It was an enjoyable 3 hours but to me was still a level B. And that was that another PPV done and dusted.