I wrote something on this subject before that a lot of people related to. Some folk thought it was about them anaw. It really wisnae. The Carmel Corner are a harmless bunch of dudes who just really love Carmel. Sometimes they make some noise about that. Its fine. I would join but the collective “I’m no shaggin anyone ever” bodyheat of that unit (myself included) would make me sweat tae I literally died. But boays. Have at it. I have pals and even family involved in the corner, and none of them are on Ket, so as far as I’m concerned they’re daein awrite. My point wasnt to have a go at anyone, it was merely an outlet for me to spew my long-standing opinions out, and have my ego validated by people caring about it. It fuckin worked anaw.
Anyway, this shite has been floating about my brain since before Christmas, so out it shall come. Marvel at how fuckin disgusting it is. White hot ego juice masquerading as a piece of writing. I mean look at that. Using the word “masquerading” like I know what the fuck it means. If I was any further up my own arse, I’d be shaking hauns with my colon.
I see a lot of posts/comments from wrestlers and fans alike stating everything that’s wrong with British Wrestling, and what needs to happen to fix it. Its all bellyaching shite that has no impact on anything. Unless you commit to drumming up a campaign to back your cause, it cant be done by one person. One person putting up a FB status isnae enough to affect change in a whole industry. But look at the reaction every time a wrestler does that. Other wrestlers. Agreeing. Applauding their bravery for speaking out against that dodgy promoter who used Lionhearts neck break as a snidey promotional tool. Speak out against the dafty who tagged everyone on planet earth in an online poll for a website, so they could win it and wear it as a badge of meaningless honour. Speak out against the cunt who refuses to stop doing a move which had broken 3 necks. Say something when a promoter underpays you. Say something when some arsehole wae a blog writes something inaccurate about you, but do it TOGETHER. Thats the only way this unprofessional underbelly of British Wrestling goes away. If people come together, put their personal differences aside, and speak out against the daft shit that gives British Wrestling a bad name. Because your FB statuses mean nothing. Your badly disguised digs in tweets are a waste of finger energy. Ye could be like Renfrew and use that spare energy to finger somedys sister. Renfrew is one who uses social media to champion what he does, and a lot of folk could learn from that. Know why its important to come together and weed out the shiters?
Because British Wrestling is it. Whether the Scottish scene likes being lumped in with the English scene or not disnae matter. There is a wealth of talent across the board and 3 major promotions doing amazing numbers, with a good few underneath them doing great things as well. Theres no fucking need to put up with it anymore, you wrestle in the strongest scene in Europe right now, and if you want it to continue to grow and get stronger, weed out the dafties. Anyone who you think affects your ability to make money from Pro Wrestling, get them to fuck. The reason British Wrestling has any problems whatsoever is over saturation. Too many folk wrestling and not enough shows. Over saturation leads to people not being used, and that leads to resentment. That resentment sees storylines and wrestling characters cross into real life, and that’s when cunts start to hate each other. That’s when cunts dont want to speak to other cunts, because that cunt is a cunt, and I no longer speak tae that cunt, cause he he cunted me wae a cuntin 2×4 and burst my eye socket open. Cunt.
It helps nothing. The reason there’s a million wrestlers in the UK, and about a hunner schools is that they’re allowed to do it. When someone who hasn’t even been properly trained themselves opens a school, naecunt stops it. They moan, but thats about it. Why just moan when you can affect change? Social media is a huge timesink, and a pain in the fuckin arse sometimes, but its also a free promotional tool. You can reach an intended audience within seconds, and ye don’t need to print out a flyer, or send someone a DVD. Its there. Use it. If cunts aren’t doing things properly, get them fuckin tellt.
A funny picture to separate part one of this blog from part 2 will follow…
As you all know, one of the Snapmare Necks team is currently quite ill. Cancer n that. Part of the reason I’ve not been writing as much, and why it takes me 10 year to review anything is that its pretty difficult without her. Shes been at some shows, but no as many, and a lot of the passion I have for wrestling is carried by her. Her going daft over things is infectious as fuck and without that, its just a wee bit difficult to write about wrestling the way I usually do. I WILL finish reviewing Spacebaws tonight though, and it is looking no bad.
Anyway, as everycunt will also know, Kris Travis is also battling cancer right now, and I wanted to say from the bottom of my heart, the bravery and determination he has shown has been a huge inspiration. I respected his abilities as a wrestler before, but as a man he has proven to be one of the strongest people I’ve ever had the fortune of encountering. The support from fellow pros and fans is a testament to how much good British Wrestling can do if people come together. That backing has kept Kris connected to the business he loves, and showed him that when he does beat that horrible disease, its right there waiting for his return. God bless ye mate. I don’t even believe in god, but fuck it, he’s getting a shout. If ye dae exist, we kinda need yer help down here. Nae pressure big yin. Stay cool.
Also hugely important to say how sound a lot of wrestlers have been in wishing Connie well, and Paul London for being the best cunt on planet earth. Its been touching to see the amount of folk who have reached out. Wrestlers, fans, weirdos who want to embed a lock of her hair up their nose and sniff it forever. Everycunt. Yees are aw sound. Its been really braw to see that though, and it is hugely appreciated.
Lastly, just wanted to congratulate a couple of pals for getting to the next stage of the GPWA training course. GPWA is a prime example of how wrestlers can pass their knowledge on to people who are dedicated to making a go of wrestling. It demands that you face the fact that you might be rejected, and told by people with experience in the business that it’s not for you. So congratulations to Jamie and Daniel for getting through. Aye I’m name dropping cunts, so whit? Fight me aboot it. Nah seriously though, proud of the two of them. Jamie better use the Razors Edge as his finisher but, or we cannae be pals anymore.
Aye fuck it. Thats all I had to say really. Here’s a picture of Fandango and Hulk Hogan flexing to remind you of a simpler time. Where I wasn’t shouting at you like a mad preacher.
(PSYCHE! Its actually Batista in a flat cap saying deal with it)