Aye I’m writing a “5/10/20/59 reasons why something topical is important, please click me” thing. So whit? When I done a piece taking the piss out of these things about Dolph Ziggler, I discovered that its fuckin fun. Fun to do the list itself, and also fun to have a wee thread of sarcasm running through it towards the fact that these articles are all you ever see these days. I’ll lay aff the sarcasm side a wee bit here, because this is serious. People don’t understand how much hinges on the outcome of Drew Galloway vs Chris Renfrew for the ICW Title at the Square Go, so I’m going to hammer it home as hilariously as possible here. For me this match carries more importance overall than Jester vs Galloway did, because truth be told, a lot of people were ready for a new champion. A year is a long time in wrestling, especially as a title holder, and even if you’ve carried the belt with pride and represented the company it belongs to with nobility, the chances are folk are gonnae get bored. Wrestling fans are always waiting for the next big thing. That thing in ICWs case was big Drew. Both figuratively and literally cause the cunt’s 6 foot 7 and built like a brick shithoose. The Jester diehards rebelled, and continue to have the petted lip on that he dropped the belt, but a lot of people were happy with Drew taking the title, and recognised that he’s probably the guy ICW needs to be pushed into the big leagues.
With Renfrew things are a weeeee bit different.
Different in exactly 8 ways. Specifically. 8 and 8 only. Here are those 8 ways…
1. Renfrew has a following
I doubt it escaped your attention, but Renfrew is a wee bit popular. For a heel who tells the fans how much he hates all of your basement dwelling, anime porn watching guts on such a regular basis, he still gets thunderous pops at times. Anytime he’s within 500 miles of the ICW Champion wae that briefcase in tow, there’s a horde of stampeding NAK 4 lifers (myself unashamedly included) spunking themselves inside out at the prospect of him cracking it over the champ’s dome and taking the belt. Those very same people might not take too kindly at waiting a full year for a cash-in that isn’t even successful.
2. Drew needs to connect with audience
I’m not saying he hasn’t achieved that already. The way he came back, and his performances in the ring since returning have been more than enough to make an impact, but a connection with an audience comes naturally more often than not. It can’t be written by some arsehole with a background in TV writing, and it can’t be created in a backstage promo someone told you to do, or a big time spot in a match that 5 different guys came together to dream up. It comes from doing something, either measured or spontaneous, which forms a natural bond between the performer and their target audience. For me, there would be no better way for Drew to achieve that, than by going out there at the very venue where he made his triumphant return, and having the match of his life with the man who he stopped becoming champion that very night. Chris Renfrew is clearly ready. He’s got in the best shape of his life for this fight, so the quality of the match itself is ultimately down to how much Drew invests in it. The sound of his promos, and the ferocity of the beating he gave Lewis Girvan at Spacebaws, would indicate he’s more than up for it.
3. The title cant be seen as unattainable
There’s one issue with having such a huge star, who’s physically more impressive than pretty much everyone on your roster. If you give him the title, there’s a danger that it becomes untouchable. Title matches are seen as filler, as the big man waits for his next true challenge. That’s when folk start to dread main events rather than them being the highlight of the night, because no one likes a massacre. The reason Drew vs Lewis Girvan worked so well is because Drew made Lewis look like a fuckin superstar at times, and he’s young enough and impressive enough that the kicking he took ultimately does him no harm (other than the tapestry of handprints he’d have woken up with on his chest the next morning) but if Drew does that sort of thing on a regular basis to established guys, people are going to get fatigued with it. Especially if its guys like Jester, Renfrew and Joe Coffey, who between them probably cover the whole spectrum of ICW fans. So its important that even if Renfrew fails to become champion, that the match is believable. There has to be points where Renfrew looks like the very same bad bastard who’s been wreaking havoc on Scottish Wrestling for the past year and a half, or else what was the point in building him up that way in the first place?
4. This matters to Joe Coffey as well
Whilst Joe has business of his own to take care of with the Iron Man Challenge at the Square Go, he will no doubt have an eye on the title match. There’s a few shows in between the Square Go and Barramania, and anything can happen. but if ICWs trend of not passing the title around like a joint at a hoose party continues, its likely that whoever leaves the Square Go as champion will defend against Joe at Barramania. I said to a few folk that I felt the natural progression for the ICW Title would be to go from Drew, to Joe Coffey eventually. Considering how much of their work comes from the strength they possess, and the believability of their matches, a Drew Galloway vs Joe Coffey match has always felt like an inevitability for me. If that inevitability leads to them teeing off on each others jaws at Barramania with the belt on the line remains to be seen. The thing Joe will be mindful of is that Drew vs Joe will undoubtedly headline the show, but Renfrew vs Joe might not. It fucking undoubtedly should btw, but if someone was to return and cost Drew the belt at the Square Go, leading to another monstrous feud for Barramania, Renfrew vs Joe might take a backseat.
5. There probably isn’t 8 reasons, so lets use number 5 for a wee half-time break
How good was that NJPW show eh? Wrestle Kingdom 9 is a wee example that pro wrestling still exists. Between that show, and Spacebaws, my love for this shit has never been stronger. If you haven’t seen Wrestle Kingdom, fuckin dae it. If you haven’t seen Spacebaws, or a hunner other ICW shows, get On Demand. Anyway. Half-time break over. I’ll go n hunt out a funny picture before we get on with the rest of the list. Gies a wee minute…..
You’d expect the NAK to be involved, and in fact, I fully encourage that to be the case. Why have an army if you don’t use its soldiers? So whilst his brerr fae anerr maw BT Gunn is away trying to kill his cousin in a cage, Divers is still a factor. Darkside might be as well depending on injury, and lets not fully rule out BT Gunn getting involved in some way. If him and Wolfie opens the show for example (which would make sense, cause the cage can be a cunt to set up, so it gets that part of it out the road before any fans appear) and it comes to a conclusive end, I could maybe sense a sniff at a BT Gunn face turn, and that might happen with him costing Renfrew the belt. This is all speculative shit though, if any of that happens, I can assure you, I don’t have a man on the inside. Me and Toal are pals right enough, but he’s too busy bawdeep in that burd of his to take me tae the cinema anymore, so I don’t have any contacts. I’m not the media wing of the NAK or that, even though I heavy fanboy over them. That’s not what this is. Either way, too much NAK involvement leading to Renfrew winning the belt would sour the title win, whilst not enough involvement would put the loyalty of the NAK soldiers into question. If theres a happy medium there, its important to find it. Personally I think that happy medium is Renfrew sharpening the top of Divers heid and throwing him at Drew like a spear, but once again, thats speculative.
7. Its placement on the card is hugely important
I’m no usually arsed about where things are on the card, but in a card that’s short on matches due to the Square Go itself, it actually matters where this match ends up. Jester vs Devitt was a huge match at the same event last year, but the Square Go still main evented. On this card, not only do we have the Square Go itself, but Wolfgang vs BT Gunn end one of the most emotionally charged feuds in Scottish history inside a steel cage. Chuck an Iron Man match into the mix, and you have 4 matches that have a case for main eventing the show. For me, if Renfrew vs Drew does go on last, that would indicate that they want to showcase it as much as possible, and also that it wont have a squeaky clean finish. If it goes on earlier, it might be the thing so many Renfrew fans are dreading. Big Drew dominating and winning clean. I can’t see that happening right enough, even if it is on earlier, I think the match will be dynamite, but if it isn’t on last, a lot of folk who have been so invested in Renfrews quest to become champion might not be thrilled at his shot at the belt coming somewhere in the middle of the card.
8. ICW goes on tour after this
People need to be at these shows. Know what brings people to shows? Other shows being fucking brilliant. People watch these other shows, and think “I’m gonnae go to the next one!” and thats what leads daft cunts like me to go up and down Britain in every sweatbox intercity bus they can physically drag their arse on to, and staying in every low budget, no even any handcream to lube up for your nightly wank, hotel in the land. All in the name of wrestling, and ICW. This title match has to somehow strike the balance between having the long-term interests of ICW taken care of, placating the diehards who are desperate for Renfrew to become champion, keeping Drew popular and strong even if hes defeated, and last but not least, having a fucking barnstormer of a match. A proper scrap, where the one who loses the least teeth, loses respect. The one who makes it out with 4 working limbs, will have one of those limbs taken from them backstage for besmirching the good name of ICW. The guy who can walk tall, is the guy who’s left in a heap of his own bodily fluids at the end, with a shiny belt lying across their lifeless body. “This belt is my trophy” that person will say “My salvation from all my demons, and I fully think it was worth having the top half of my jaw ripped out, and shoved up my arse in the process of getting it”
Who walks out of the 02 with the gold is open to whatever prediction you fancy throwing at it, but what isn’t in a modicum of doubt, is just how important this match is in terms of setting the tone in 2015 for ICW.
Thanks as usual to David J Wilson for the photos, and to Warrior Fight Photography.
As for the England tour, I’d quite like to go to all the shows again and cover them, but I’m skint as fuck. If you want to help me do that, you can become a “patron” of the site. Nae obligation to give anything monthly or that. If I do raise enough to cover travel and accommodation I will vow to have results and a short review of every show up by noon the next day, and a more detailed review of every show once they go On Demand. If you’ve any interest in supporting the site, have a gander at the link here. Cheers for reading.