Bridgeton is lovely. Have you been? You should. They have wrestling, and also an enviable platter of bars and shops to choose from on the high street.
Pride are doing good things. Building a wee fanbase and putting on thoroughly decent shows. You should be at them. If you were at this one you’d have witnessed Renfrew and DCT have a match that is up there with pretty much anything I’ve seen in Scotland this year, before Polo and Damo put on an outstanding main event. Good value for a tenner, considering thats the price of a half pint of heavy in London. Basically what I’m trying to say is, Bridgeton is better than London.
Christopher Saynt vs Matt Daly
Matt Daly eh. A name so nice, he has to say it a hunner times. His entrance music is him saying Matt Daly a lot. He gets on the mic and says Matt Daly a lot. Its his name. His opponent was not Matt Daly, but Chris Saynt. He had grown tired of hearing Matt Daly say his own name, and lulled him into a trap. Urging him to tell us one more time what his name is, before calmly removing a table tennis paddle from his boot and ping ponging a few of Daly’s teeth out (he actually just slapped him, I’m sorry for misleading you)
Daly recovered to mount some sleekit villainous offence, before they exchanged uppercuts and jabs. It was my first time seeing Daly wrestle properly, and he done a lot to vanquish the memory of him falling down the stairs at SWA Motherwell, with a competent, suitably annoying performance. It made me feel bad about laughing a lot when he did fall down they stairs, because Matt Daly is more than that. Basically, if you’re after a bad yin that likes raking peoples eyes and shouting his name in your childs face, he’s your guy. Saynt took the win with a big kick to the chest after a sexy wee bulldog, and that was that. I hate to sound like every other cunt who’s ever reviewed a wrestling show, but this was a “solid opener”. Totally solid. Like Asher D.
(Asher D was a member of the So Solid Crew btw…that was the joke…nah? fine)
Glen Dunbar vs ‘Futureshock’ Tom Fulton
I’ve got a wee soft spot for Glen Dunbar, and I don’t think he knows it cause everytime he comes out at Pride, he looks at me like I pished in a watering can and watered his eyes as he slept. I have nae idea where the wee soft spot comes from, because anytime I’ve seen him wrestle, he’s been a right bastard. Lying, cheating and stealing like a Poundland Eddie Guerrero, but he can go. Dunbar vs Whiplash for the Pride Title was a belter. For me this match never really caught the imagination, which seems unthinkable considering Dunbar’s opponent has a blue beard, and tassles on his trunks, but whit can I tell ye. I was never at full mast for it, but it did get better after a slow start. Dunbar hit a lovely leaping neckbreaker, before Fulton hit back with a springboard cutter, before Dunbar finished Fulton off with a Sitout Firemans Carry Slam. Nae offence to the blue bearded one, who proved a worthy adversary on the night, but if a man has a 500+ day reign as the champion of a promotion, he needs more formidable opponents. perhaps Bill Goldberg, John Cena’s Da or a live wolf.
The Z List (Euan G.Mackie and Dave Conrad) vs Manateur Wrestling
The bold Jam and Euan G.Mackie emerged to tell us all about their plans for the future. Finally Pride Wrestling had given The Z List a chance and they were out to issue an open challenge to any upstart tag team who wanted to get wide. Jam told various children to shut up, while the worlds most dangerous men, Manateur Wrestling emerged to answer the challenge. Scottish Wrestling has a lot of good things going on, things that you aren’t likely to see anywhere else. Things like a tag team that consists of a guy in full amateur gear complete with helmet, teaming with a guy who wrestles in wee pink trunks and lists “dancing with your dazed opponent against his or her will” as a signature move, but thats what you have with Daihlan Hendry and the bold Manlon. Unfortunately for them they had already been involved in the tournament to crown the first ever Pride Tag Team Champions, but Jam seemed not fussed at giving them another shot. As he had a wee trick up his sleeve too. Looking dapper in a 3 piece suit, Jam had no intention of wrestling in the match himself. Instead leaving it to the newest member of the Z List. David Conrad.
The match was quite entertaining, if you like seeing ballroom dancing in pretty much the opposite of a ballroom (there was a lot of balls in the room, but that’s yer average wrestling crowd…90 percent baws…usually sweaty) you’d have liked this match. If you like seeing people rob Seth Rollins patter (which he robbed from anyone who’s ever been called a sell out ever) then you’d have enjoyed Dave Conrad insisting HE BOUGHT IN. If you enjoy missile dropkicks from Manlon, then it had that too. He also took Euan over his knee and gave his cheeky erse a wee slap. Some beautiful suplexes from Hendry brought the amateur style to the forefront, but the double snapmare was the highlight of the whole piece. Attempts to get a “snapmare city” chant failed to get going, even though its relevant as fuck and Daihlan Hendry is definitely Brock Lesnars illegitimate lovechild. Big Dave hit a a backbreaker on Manlon, and powerslam on Daihlan, and for a while it looked like him and Euan were sending the Z-List into the next round, but the power of Manatuer Wrestling was too much. They drew on the powers of all the quirky tag teams that went before them. The Rock and Sock Connection, Kenny and Joe (Joe Kendry) Billy, Chuck and Irene, and so on and so forth. Pulling all that quirkyness together, combined with the power of a Daihlan Hendry flying knee and a swift 3 count, the game was up. The job was done. Dave Conrad might not have sold out, but he did buy in to a tall chilled glass of devastating defeat.
Chris Renfrew vs DCT (N7 Title Match)
When you talk about Scottish Wrestling to folk, they’d think of the usuals first. Drew, Jester, Grado, Roddy Roddy Piper etc. That team. They’re the figureheads. The thing that unfortunately doesn’t spring to mind is things like this. Things like DCT and Renfrew having a war on a Saturday night in Bridgeton. Things like a character known mainly for catchphrases and charisma strengthening his continued emergence as one of the best up and coming wrestlers in the country with another quality display in the ring. Weird to call a man an up and comer in the ring, when he’s been coming up yer maws ring for a number of years as it is, but that’s neither here nor is it err there. Renfrew continues to put on matches that are engaging and a wee bit different. If you’re a fan of Renfrew at ICW, I would recommend a wee trip to Bridgeton to see a slightly less serious, but still sufficiently evil side of him at Pride. The match he had with Lewis Girvan to become N7 champ was a belter in its own right, but for me this topped it. This was violent with an air of mutual respect. DCT earning Renfrew’s respect more with every chop he took and chucked in return. With every decapitating lariat he returned with interest. DCT might have taken a bit of a doing when he had his debut match against Renfrew at Pride a couple of years ago, but those days are behind him. A ref no longer. A punching bag of a bygone era. DCT is now solid as fuck. And he came to fight.
A waistlock takedown grounded DCT early, before he hit back with an elbow to the ribcage and the first scoop attempt of the night. Another fairly special thing happening in Scottish Wrestling right now is the fact that Polo Promotions have made the scoop slam a feared move. Folk like Renfrew desperately jumping out the way of it strengthens it even further. And why should it not be feared. It hoists the opponent into the air, and sends them crashing down on to their spine. Dunts to the spine are generally quite sore. DCT followed Renfrew outside and they battered each other with stiff forearms, but Renfrew gained the upper hand back in the ring with a back suplex followed by a big punt kick to the back. They battered each other stupid with chops, Renfrew must take a bit of offence to BT Gunn being regarded as the undisputed chop champion of the universe, because some of the ones he hit DCT with looked like fucking stoaters. DCT returned them in kind, but was sent arse over tash once more when Renfrew hit the missile dropkick. DCT then blocked an attempt at the T-Virus, before connecting with a belter of a knee. The most devastating move in sports entertainment today came next with the scoop slam, but Renfrew dished out a brutal looking german suplex of his own. I really hope that list of moves paints an adequate picture of the ferocity that these two battered each other with. It was extremely ferocious. They took turns in trying to clothesline each other’s heids aff, Renfrew striking with two belters, before DCT hit one of his own, but both emerged from the duel surprisingly fully formed. More wrestling I suppose then eh?
They stood toe to toe and slung vicious forearms at each other, as their teeth and portions of bottom lip made its way into the mix. They continued knocking the living fuck out each other on the apron, with DCT brining the potentially deadly battle to an end with a decisive DDT on the apron. DCT kicked out of the Stone Cold Stoner as well, before another back and forth of deadly chops led to DCT hitting a Spike DDT, but before he could find out if Thomas Kearins hand was hitting that mat for a third time, Sweeney pulled the gallant ref out, and by the time he got back to the action Renfrew had DCT in the small package for the 1,2,3. Renfrew retains with an assist from Sweeney. More like Street INJustice eh? What a bloody carry on.
Renfrew actually appeared to be slightly raging at Sweeney and as Sweeney trudged to the back Renfrew offered DCT his hand. Two guys who had just went to war showing each other respect. Nothing more beautiful in pro wrestling is there? Even Sweeney ambushing DCT seemed to gain no favour with Renfrew, as he picked up his belt and continued to look raging, but then ye remember Santa Claus isn’t real, the tooth fairy is using your teeth to build a fort to keep the gypsies off her land, and any show of respect towards a good guy from a villain in wrestling, will inevitably lead to that good guy getting knocked the fuck out. DCT did come to Bridgeton for the N7 belt, so it seems only right that he left with it imprinted in his napper, but you wonder if the show of respect from Renfrew was real. It seemed to be. A genuine bond formed between two guys who know they took each other to the fuckin limit. Wrestling.
Bobby Roberts vs Mike Musso
Hard to follow one of the better matches of the year, even with a wee break in between, this one didn’t grab you like the one that went before it. Fair play to Musso for doing his best to piss off the locals, by telling them all that’s he done shites that smelled better than Bridgeton, but no one does the “ah fuckin HATE Glesga” patter quite like Liam Thomson. That time he came out and burned and effigy of John Smeaton was particularly galling. Bobby came out and proved his authentic Scottishness by reciting the names of everyone who died in The Battle of Bannockburn, before the two giants got to the wrestling. Failing to move each other with some shoulderblocks. Musso outlined his intentions to be the villain of this particular story, as he raked Bobbys eyes, Bobby replying with a scud to the jaw and some lariats, before his spear attempt was dodged. Musso took over for a spell, getting Bobby tied up in a crossface chickenwing on the ropes, then hitting a splash in the corner before Bobby turned the tables with the Lou Thesz press. A spinebuster and a spear got him the 3 count, and everyone chucked buckets of tartan paint in the air in jubilant celebration.
Ryan Griffin vs Dickie Divers
Mad Flyin Ryan. He’s death defyin. More death defyin than death defyin Dickie Divers? Dunno. Now try saying that backwards 15 times. Nah seriously though, I recall Flyin Ryan getting an absolute doing off Rampage Brown at an SWA show, but aside from that and him partaking in the SWA Battlezone, I don’t remember seeing him wrestle. He is rather decent at it. Perfect high-flying, crowd pleasing guy for family friendly shows. Dickie Divers is for children of all ages, and yer Da. Dickie Divers is a bad yin. Dickie Divers would throw spit his chewing gum in your childs hair if he thought he could get away with it.
Dickie Divers displayed his badness with a slap to Flyin Ryans jaw, before Griffin hit back with a dropkick. A running knee from Divers, was joined by a bulldog soon after as Dickie took over. He connected with a leg drop on the apron as well, before Flyin Ryan lived up to his name with some textbook eh…..flyin I suppose eh? Flyin forearms, flyin dropkicks, flyin senton, flyin headscissors. Everything was in the air. Divers hit a peach of a German Suplex to get the momentum shifting back in his favour. Everycunt’s getting in on this German Suplex action, and I condone it fully. A fame-asser from Griffin got him a two count after that, before he missed with the double stomp off the top, and Divers connected square on the jaw with a superkick, and a rope assisted pin attempt gave Divers the win. Enjoyable match, but nae amount of flyin can stop Divers dislodging your jaw with that running knee, or derailing your hopes of victory with a bit of sleekitness.
Viper vs Courtney vs Debbie Sharp
Theres no surer way to get yourself over as a bad yin than attacking the princess of punchin fuck out ye, but that’s exactly what Debbie Sharp done when she decided to leather Viper before this match even started. In fact we didn’t even have our full quota of competitors yet. Pure and utter madness unfolding in front of our very eyes. Courtney came out and stopped the unlawful attack, leading to her and Viper having the first actual wrestling exchanges of the match. Debbie joined the fray soon after and took time out her busy schedule of praying for herself to stand on Courtneys hair. Pulling every strand of it from its roots. Rendering Courtney entirely bald, and thus much more aerodynamic than she was before, as she hit Debbie with a peach of a front dropkick. Viper of course asserted her dominance after that, hitting Debbie and Courtney (whos hair had magically grown back in by this point) with a double clothesline. A scoop slam and Viper driver on Debbie seemed to have the match sewn up for the Duchess of dick-kicking, but Courtney broke up the pin. Seemingly stunned by her pals disrespect, Viper got up, took in a deep breath, and let out a thunderous “haw you!” but before anyone could blink, Viper was taken out the equation and Courtney tapped Debbie out with an armbar.
Jackie Polo (c) vs Big Damo (Pride Championship Match)
Polo vs Damo would be a fitting main event for any show. Wrestlemania aside, as they would probably insist on getting Scott Walker to sing Jackie out to the ring. Not acceptable in any circumstance because Jackie Polo sings HIMSELF out to the ring. On this occasion, he sung himself out to the ring twice. Despite Damo’s best attempts to derail his second attempt when he found the pause button on the nearby laptop charged with playing the entrance themes, and any wacky races type sound effects that needed to be added to the show as it happened. Damo seemed to find Polo standing on chairs, and loudly belting out his own tune quite amusing to begin with, until he didn’t. A big dropkick got the physical side of the match going and it never really let up from that point on. Damo likes to throw people about. Especially people who annoy him, but he perhaps didn’t expect to be on the receiving end of as much throwing as he was. Polo responded to a barrage of forearms by hitting Damo with a jumping knee to the outside, but Damo turned the tabled when he chucked Jackie into a section of his biggest fans. A collection of 400-500 Jackie Polo fans, all in home-made (unofficial) Jackie Polo t-shirts. He battered Jackie in amongst his people for a while, before picking each an every fan and dunking them heid first in the biggest puddle he could find. Damo didn’t come to Bridgeton to fuck about, he came for a belt.
Polo derailed the Beast’s momentum by throwing him into a wall, before they got back into the ring. Polo attempting to wear the big man down with armbars, forearms and even a wee bit of choking via the bottom rope. Damo responded with a big heid removing clothesline before Polo locked in a sleeper. Back and forth it went. A fitting main event. The best singles match I’ve seen Polo involved in since the last time he wrestled Joe Coffey. He had the wind and probably a few vital organs knocked clean out him with the rolling senton, before Damo missed the follow-up senton attempt. Polo took the opportunity to gain the upper hand in the match. Defying the laws of gravity to hit Damo with a beauty of a Northern Lights suplex, followed by not one, not two but…aye two. TWO scoop slams. He even nailed the Polo Plex, but it still wasn’t enough. It couldn’t be argued that Jackie Polo didn’t throw absolutely everything he had at this match. He wanted to keep that Pride belt displayed proudly in its custom made case in the Polo Promotions games room, but when Damo stands on your chest, and you happen to be a mere mortal. Your chest crumbles. The senton that usually follows tends to stop your heart for at least 3 seconds, but maybe it was a slow count because Polo KICKED OUT AT 2. If that belt was to find a new home, it would have to be prized from Jackie Polo’s cold deid hands. The Ulster Plantation sealed the deal, and the beast had a shiny new trinket to add to his growing collection. Most of his trinkets are the skulls of the men who have dared to step into his path right enough, but a shiny belt will be a fine addition to the collection. Perhaps another shiny belt might be joining it this Sunday at the ABC.
Excellent show from Pride. First half main event was one of the better matches of the year and the title match was everything it promised to be, with a lot more of Damo being suplexed than any of us might have envisaged. From the fire of suplexes, he emerged with the gold. As seen below, delightfully photographed by David J.Wilson.