Kayfabe Is Dead. Good Riddance to it.


Credit David J Wilson for the photo

Look at that photo above. BT Gunn planted face down. Beaten, battered and torn to shreds by his own flesh and blood. This isn’t another Wolfgang vs BT hype up article btw, I think we covered that yesterday. It’s just an example of something I’ve firmly believed for the best part of 10 years in wrestling, and something I’d proudly tell anyone who asked for my irrelevant opinion on it. Kayfabe is fucking dead. Good riddance to the fucker as well.

If that shit startles you, hear me out. A wee glance at that photo above would indicate that Chris Renfrew is out for Wolfgang’s blood. Wolfgang isn’t in shot, but he was the man responsible for leaving Renfrews brother face down on the canvas, unable to properly fill his lungs with oxygen. Burst. This wee image would have you believe Wolfgang and Renfrew truly hate each other with a burning passion eh? Well guess what, they fucking don’t. They’re pals and that’s what wrestling is now. That’s what you have to able to separate. Being 100% invested in the show that you came to see, whilst having the ability to separate the show from real life. By all means lose your shit when you’re at a show/watching a show. The more shit lost the better, but for me it’s far more enjoyable to be able to suspend disbelief for 2-4 hours at a time, fully buy into the shows, and have an understanding of what makes it all tick the rest of the time. Let yourself be worked by these cunts. Its what they do best. Dont sit on the fucking internet and talk about buy rates, and what champion drew more than another one, because guess fucking what, its none of our business. You’re a wrestling fan. I’m a wrestling fan. Our one and only role in this industry is to be fans. We are not analysts, either financial or otherwise. We’re fucking dolts and if the wrestlers know what they’re doing, they’ll have us eating out of the palm of their evil hands. If they choose not to keep that act up in their spare time? So fuck.

Being a wrestler pre late 1990s seemed fucking exhausting to me. Always having to be “on”. It would have been entirely unnatural and pretty fuckin weird if kayfabe continued to be as strong as it once was. There’s no need any more for best pals to stop travelling together because they’re involved in a bitter feud. There’s no need for the villains to be snuck out the back of the building. It’s antiquated, and more than a bit daft to expect people to keep living 100% of their lives as a wrestling character these days. That where the line between character and person gets blurry, and people start to fall apart. They start to forget what one they are from night to-night. Modern wrestling allows people to be people, and still give their all to the wrestling character they portray.

B7w7G0sCQAEvs8sTake a wee look at that image now. Compare it to the one at the top. That’s Triple H going over to a child who he made cry at RAW last night, apologising to him and giving him a wee pat on the heid. He then arranged for the boy to go backstage to meet his heroes after the show. Years ago this wouldn’t be allowed at all, and would probably have got Triple H fined, no matter what corporate role he holds with the company. I don’t believe Triple H broke kayfabe at all though, I think kayfabe died a long time ago, and what Triple H done was an example of why modern-day wrestling is a better, more free-flowing form of entertainment than it was back in the days of people having to hide friendships to keep up appearances. I will say one thing for the wee man, he needs tae grow a set. Does he not know all of this is fake? Fuckin calm it Janet. Seriously though, I’ve never ever subscribed to this idea that kids are fair game in terms of verbal insults (not saying that’s how Trips caused the tears btw) being slung at them by villains.
Children are sensitive souls, and the daftest wee thing can affect them in the hugest way. I’ve seen 2 or 3 wrestlers calling weans fat, and making fun of their appearance generally at shows, and I don’t understand it. What the fuck is that? Is that supposed to be clever? A child comes to a show, maybe getting bullied at school, or doesn’t have any pals. The show is a wee escape. Maybe they don’t even have a shite life at all. Maybe they’re popular as fuck and always get picked first for fitba. The point is. That throwaway bit of verbal abuse could stay with that child a long time. Most of them will laugh it off, but I don’t think any sort of performer has the right to make a child make that sort of decision. Scare the wee yins all you want. Jester is fucking brilliant at that. Don’t be cruel. Imagine how you’d feel if you showed up at the wrestling as a youngster. Excited about it for months. Kitted out in all the gear, juice, sweeties, a wee programme. Good times….

Come ahead wee man, I've shat bigger than you, ya tiny wee child prick.

Come ahead wee man, I’ve shat bigger than you, ya tiny wee child prick.

Then The Great Khali stoats oot, picks you up be the throat and calls you a “tiny wee bawbag” and stuffs you in the nearest bin. How the fuck would you feel? Not good. I’m away on a tangent here, but the point I’m getting at is that Triple H is a father. Triple H is not a man who enjoys seeing children cry, nor does he enjoy being responsible for doing it, so see if he wants to break character, and give the young yin a hug and say sorry? More power too the big beaked bastion of batterings. I have never respected Triple H more than I did in that moment, because he knew it could get him into trouble, and he knew a lot of IWC neckbeard basement dwellers would have an issue with it, but he didn’t give a fuck. He went ahead and done it anyway. Fuck you if you’ve got a problem with it. If I was Paul Levesque and I fancied getting a decent nights sleep every now and again, I would apologise to all the children I made cry by being a dirty villainous bastard as well, because at the end of the day, life’s too fucking short for wrestling to be everything. It should be an escape from the grind for people of all ages. Mentally manipulate the ones big enough and old enough to know they’re being manipulated all you fucking like, but if you make a child cry and you’re any sort of person you’ll apologise and no one on this earth should have a problem with that.

Wrestling isn’t everything. Kayfabe is now a tool to be used rather than the thing this whole wrestling business is based on. Either enjoy wrestling as it currently is, with all the different aspects that can make it brilliant (even things like social media interaction with the right sort of people is a huge plus) or get the WWE Network and watch “the good old days” all you fucking want. Please don’t bother the rest of us with your out of date wanky “opinions” though. So to any neckbeard fandan reading this thinking im out of order, your opinion is indeed a bit like your arsehole. Hairy, sweaty and full of fucking shite.